Chapter16

Chapter 16:

Sam and I had to get up every night to feed Roof, change his nappy…every night again! But we couldn’t get used to that ritual, so we felt confused when our son started crying in night, we had to remember where we are and who it is, the crying person!
That night Sam had to get up and calm Rufus down so I could continue to sleep; Sam was proud of himself, because he was better in reassuring our 3- weeks- year old kid than me; I noticed that he liked it. And … Sam also enjoyed the time, when he could be together with our cute boy!
At that moment I felt how much I would love my little family! So I talked to my boyfriend about our love.
I really noticed that we have to stay together, for the rest of the live; I want that the time is available! Everything fits together so well!
Before Roof’s birth I didn’t imagined that the time with him could be as nice as it is now (of course, it is heavy and also stressful, but the most time it is wonderful to see the growing of my own kid: D)

The following day I was alone with Roof because Sam went to college. In the afternoon he came inside very angry, he reproached me that I have had sex with my ex and that roof wasn’t his baby, that he was the looser who care about roof and my although he needn’t, because he isn’t roofs father…
But…why does he think stuff like that? I didn’t realized it at first, I never thought about these nonsense, I was sure that Sam is the father and I was happy about it and it wasn’t possible that there was an other boy…!?!?!!!!
And than…suddenly I knew who talked to Sam and wants to make me in trouble and split Sam and me up! it was my ex! He is at the same college than Sam and he is jealous that I left him because of the difficult topic SEX and now I am a mom! I was sure, my ex likes beating someone up and he is jealous!
But that wasn’t the point… of course… I can understand him a bit, if there came someone to me and wants me to convince of the wrong fatherhood, I would also get uncertain…
The point is that he believes a foreign person and not his girlfriend and his baby’s mom! I was disappointed about his reaction; this is a sign that he does not really loves me and Roof! ...
By the way I was tired, although I didn’t do anything exhausting, so I was tense and Roof nerved me too…
We calmed down and I explained him that it isn’t possible that my ex is Roofs father, after that intensive discussion I went to bed and was a bit frightened because of our future and felt asleep!